My mind just gets swept away…

I never finish what I start.

If you’re not new to my blog, you may have noticed that I always start blogging challenges, and then I never finish them.

I have a bit of a reputation of being a bookworm, as I always seem to have a book in my hand; but I hardly read. I do actually like reading, I can just never finish the book. and so I carry it around, hoping I have a sudden urge to finish it; but I never even read more than a few pages at a time. I used to read a lot, but I’ve gotten lazier and lazier as the years have gone on.

I always have more then one book going at a time, because I get bored with one and I just hop to another, then another, then another, and before I know it, I’m reading 5 books at once and I’m never going to finish them before they are due back at the library!

At them moment I’m reading two books. It was one, but yesterday, I got board and picked one off the shelf and started reading it. damn it! And now I’m stuck. Which do I read? The one which I started first and is facinating, but is non-fiction and a bit of a brain workout, or the one I started yesterday, which is fictional and compelling but I have more to read before I finish it?
(Your advice would be great.. 😛 )

As you can see, I never seem to finish things, and I only just questioned that fact about an hour ago. Why do I never finish things?

Am I lazy? … Do I loose interest too quickly? … Am I picky with what I read and what I do?

And still, I cannot answer with one simple answer. I think that it’s a combination of things, although, the first that comes to mind is this; my mind just gets swept away.

Do you ever have periods of time, perhaps minutes… days… years… where your brain just goes fuzzy, and you just live your life you like you normally would, without any enjoyment. You laugh at work, chat to your friend at the super market, but you don’t go out of your way to really enjoy yourself?

I often go for weeks, where I don’t blog, (have you noticed?) I don’t read, or meditate, or paint, or anything that I have to spend time doing that I actually enjoy.

I think of it as a muscle. At the beginning, you make time now and then, to do something you love. But life busy, or your head get swept away, and you forget to schedule in these times, or even think about doing it. Then, after going a long time without doing it, you think about getting out your paint brushes or baking a cake, and you think ‘This is just too hard…’ or ‘I just can’t be bothered’.

You get lazy and this enjoyment muscle just turns to flab.

So use this as a reminder, spend some time doing something you love this week, no matter what it is. Don’t do it for your family, don’t do it for your friend, don’t even do it for me; have your sole purpose as having a good portion of ‘me’ time. Then, put a reminder in the calendar for your next session. If something else comes up in that spot later-on, DON’T LET IT! That is your time! Nothing is more important!

Anyone else have times like this? I do hope I’m not the only one…

As a part of me having a bit more ‘me’ time, I’m going to finish at least ONE of the books (I still don’t know which one..) and I’m going to blog more often, so look forward to it!

Hana xx

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